If You Can’t Be Part of Their Solutions?

In the past two weeks, three of my friends have excused themselves from social media.

So many others have sent out alerts explaining why they won’t be replying quickly to chats & DMs; they are struggling…

Two people specifically shared how drained they were, and asked everyone to please respect their inconsistencies & silence.

Not to mention the hundreds of cryptic WhatsApp statuses, tweets & Facebook ‘What’s on your mind?’ about how not-fine people are but still maintaining beauty and dripping glory.

When I see all these things, many times, I want to reach out to all of them! Comfort them, share jokes and make them laugh. I want to vibe them up & ease their pains and worries.

On the side, honestly, I know money will solve a lot of their problems. Unfortunately, I can’t give what I don’t have.

However, one thing I will never do is me being part of their problems.

No, I won’t!

A Yoruba proverb said, “Oosa b’ole gbemi, s’emi b’ose bami.” Translated to mean, you gods that cannot help my situation, at least, leave me the way you met me.

Yeah, we will not always be able to help as much as we wished we could… Your mental health might not even have the strength to bear it…

You have your own problems, after all, needing solutions. You probably want to run away too. Lorokan (in one word), you also need help.

Which means you know how it feels, and you can always understand when someone is adding to your problems – especially when they are not part of the solutions.


Don’t be that someone to another person.

If your god cannot help them, the least you can do is to leave them as they are.

If you cannot be part of their solutions, don’t be one of the problems.

May we all eventually get help and be fine.


PS: These words were first spoken to members of my emailing community. Join them now via here.